Waiting to be born

Kiddo,

You're not even here yet, and everyone's already busy preparing for your arrival. You're going to be treated like royalty, that's for sure.

But here's the thing – I've heard that newborns are pretty self-destructive. It seems you'll find every possible way to hurt, maim, and generally endanger yourself. That's a lot for a first-time dad to take in, but I promise not to be too overprotective.

As you grow, I've got some serious plans for your brain – books, languages, vocations, swimming, the works. If you don't turn out to be a prodigy, I'll be personally offended, just saying.

Your mom has already laid down the law – no phones till you're 18. I wasn’t thinking that extreme, but hey, she's the boss on this one. You can take it up with her.

You know, choosing your name was quite the task. It had to be unique, easy to pronounce, and optimized for search engines. I never liked my name much, but yours? I think you're going to like it. It’ll be our little secret until you arrive.

You’ve definitely driven a wrench into your mom’s career plans. The world’s a complicated place, and it’s tough to explain, but here’s the lowdown: your mom will choose you over her career if we let her. That’s why we have to encourage her not to give up too much.

They say the only time a mother wants to hear her baby cry is right after birth. So, when you make your big debut, clear your lungs and let out a good cry. It's going to be the most beautiful sound she’s ever heard.

See you soon, little one.