The earth shook, buildings crumbled, and people screamed, running for their lives. But he kept walking. "7,000," he muttered, sidestepping a falling lamp post. A car zoomed past, narrowly missing him. "9,500," he gasped, legs burning. The sky turned an eerie red, signaling the
"Stay in touch, okay?" [09:45 PM] "Absolutely, we'll text all the time." [09:46 PM] "Promise?" [09:47 PM] "Promise." [09:48 PM, 2 years, 3 months, 5 days ago]
"Your analysis was brilliant." "Thanks, but it was your idea that triggered it." "You did most of the work." "Without your leadership, it would've failed." "Take the damn credit, already." "No, you take it." "Take
"Why can't you do it yourself?" "Because I know you'll do it." "What would you do if I just stopped?" "But you won’t stop. You care too much."
“Let’s bet on how long it takes for them to notice.” “Notice what?” “The body.” “Dude, are you serious?” “That’s dark, man. I’m in for three days.”
"Dude, you couldn't at least shower?" "Of course I did." "Oh yeah, when?" "Sometime in the past few weeks."
"I’m dead," he moaned, lying dramatically in bed. "No, you're not," she replied, rolling her eyes. "I'm serious. My pulse is probably weak." "It's not." "Please tell my family I love them, and if
"Should we do this or that?" he asked. "I don't know," she replied. "What do you think?" "I think... maybe you should make an executive decision." "Well, my executive decision is to let you decide."
"I kept buying, hoping you’d bounce back." "Did I?" the market asked. "No, you didn’t. You just kept falling. I ran out of money." "Aw, you poor thing. All tapped out?" the market teased. "And then you fell even
“Please admit me, else my insurance won’t cover it.” “Ma’am, you have a sprained ankle.” “Well, can you at least make it worse so they’ll cover it?”
"You're going to be amazing," he told his eldest, handing over a stack of books. "You'll achieve what I never could." His eldest nodded dutifully, handing the same stack to his own child. "You're going to be amazing,"
"Wasn't there something I promised to do?" he wondered, losing himself in a funny cat video. Ah, yes, those grand promises from his last encounter with the common cold—eat clean, work out, live intentionally. Clearly, his resolve dried up as soon as his nose did.
"This is it—wait, what? Is that the end?" "No way, they can't leave it like this!" "I need to see the ending!" "I'll pay more, just show me the ending!" The TV spoke back, "How much
"Sell everything! This is it!" he shouted, trembling. "Seriously? Over 2%? You said-" "I know what I said! This is the big one!" "But you were all about long-term stability-" "Screw stability! I’m not losing everything!"
"Well, I want a baby. But not the whole pregnancy, sleepless nights, and toddler tantrums." "Exactly, let’s just skip to the part where they're all grown up and self-sufficient." "Perfect! Maybe they can even do our taxes. And cook dinner." "
"Here's your raise," he said, beaming. "Thanks! This is great! Wait a second... why is hers more?" "You're happy with yours, right?" "Ugh, no! If hers is more, I’m absolutely unhappy."