Feeling safe

Ashwin Goyal

Oct 26, 2023 — 1 min read

My ancestors heard a leaf move and ran for their lives, not knowing whether it was the wind or a lurking tiger. For them, safety was a clear-cut concept – escape danger, find shelter, survive.

But now, it's different, more complicated, less about what’s out there and more about what’s inside.

Me? I feel safe when I look at my bank balance and see that I'm not going broke. I look at my family, at their smiles and their happiness, and I’m good. I call my best friend, share a joke, laugh until my belly aches, and in that moment, the world feels right.

But then, colleagues get promotions, friends buy houses, strangers go on vacations, and I feel... unsafe. Their realized potential mirrors my insecurities. Because in the modern jungle, there are no lurking tigers, only unrealized potential.

Receiving a salary

First of the month. “What’s up, Richie Rich?” I joke to myself, staring at the salary credited text. “A new phone? Maybe a bigger TV?” I wonder, but then settle on upgrading my laptop—a necessity, I convince myself, for someone as ‘professional’ as me. Then the texts start

Watching the game

“Eye on the ball,” I remind myself. My living room transforms into the pitch, and I can smell the grass, feel the sun. I’m in my lucky spot, imaginary bat in hand, as the pacer begins his run-up. "Footwork’s the key," I coach myself, the bowler&